The Odd Block Part 9: Ivan's Reveal

Synopsis: Avery decides to face Ivan and his rude behavior head on, but receives a few surprises
Avery could feel her arms burning, a lingering pain in her upper back, and the tickle of sweat on her brow. All together it was more physical exertion than she wanted outside of a life or death situation. Her hands felt hot and stiff, while her heart was thumping unusually fast.

“You’re at eleven,” Derrick said as he looked down on her from above.

Between them was a barbell. It didn’t have much weight on it, but it was more than the zero she had lifted on a barbell since high school gym. The set was at the edge of Alan’s oddly shaped room.

The strange outsider himself listened in from the kitchen, where he was grabbing bottles of water.

Every day the hot weather was fading, but it was still warm enough that she felt the need to wear shorts and a tank. Which turned out to be useful when she suggested comprehensive self defense to Derrick.

“Twelve,” Derrick said at the exact point she finished the rep.

His exact nature was a little exhausting. But she knew that was actually her tired arms talking.

“You should easily reach 20 with that weight,” Alan said as he came back and sat in a chair next to the weight bench, “given enough time for completion.”

Avery’s arms were trembling, and she turned over toward Alan, “Are you talking hours, Alan?”

He stared off past her, “No point in being so exact. Completion is the goal.”

Avery pushed up again, watching as Derrick’s arms came forward a little in concern. But all she did was placed the bar back on the rack.

“Okay, that’s enough of that then,” She said, “I’m taking a breather.”

She let her arms fall to her sides, and took long deep breaths.

Derrick kneeled until his head was right above her, “Well, with enough days straight, it would still be beneficial, right? That plus proper diet, and maybe better form.”

“I hate this idea now,” Avery grumbled.

“You’re right, weird one,” Alan said, “her form is misshapen.”

These were two men who she thought liked her.

“Shut up,” Avery said, “both of you shut up. We’re done talking about my form. Derrick your turn.”

She sat up and prepared to roll off the bench, but a small pain went up her spine. She stopped, and put a hand to her back. It was the injury from getting attacked in defense of Derrick. For the most part, Alan’s massage fixed it, but she still had the occasional jolt of pain when she moved too fast, or turned the wrong way. Much better than barely being able to walk at least.

“You’re still harboring past injuries,” Alan said, a note of sadness in his usually oblivious voice.

Derrick moved to her side, “Should she be going to the hospital?”

“Don’t be silly,” Avery said glaring at Alan, “He probably doesn’t even know what a hospital is.”

Derrick put a hand on her shoulder, “You look like you’re still hurt, we shouldn’t be doing this at all, Avery.”

“Yes I do,” Alan said.

She shrugged him off, and then stood up. The pain was minimal, so she hoped she could hide the grimace. The last thing she needed was Derrick thinking this was his fault, or about him. He was his own kind of protective. Maybe overzealous was the right word.

“He isn’t talking about the physical injury,” Avery said, “He thinks I’m carrying some pent up emotional problems.”

“It is where you take dying people, correct?” Alan said.

“What emotional problems” Derrick said, then he looked around, “If you don’t mind.”

Avery rolled her eyes. She couldn’t be too mad that they were worried. It was normal to be concerned if you see someone limping and gritting their teeth. She asked for this by bringing the two of them together.

“Alan, is Ivan here?” Avery asked in a whisper.

Alan thought for a moment, “No.”

She huffed, “I think I need to distance myself from Ivan.”

Derrick’s mouth opened into an O, and he nodded as if it was obvious. “Well, he is kind of an a-hole.”

“Exactly. He brings a lot of negativity into my life, and a lot of anxiety.” Avery grabbed a bottle of water from the couple that Alan brought out, and took her first drink, “Just, he has lived here so long that he feels like he has free reign of the place. So I might have to…”

Derrick watched her intently as she wrestled with what words she was willing to say.

She knew what she wanted to finish with, but in the short time she controlled the apartment building she had never needed to evict anyone. Ivan and Derrick were the largest problem cases, that and Mr. Pelles with his broken pipes she still couldn’t schedule to get fixed.

“I might have to have a long talk with him,” Avery said.

Alan stood without warning, his height suddenly looming over her. “Any progress is better than nothing.”

Derrick nodded, “I agree. You shouldn’t let him control your life. Just because he has been here the longest, doesn’t make him any better.”

She felt like Derrick lost track of the point, but she felt a little better for the support. The boys were rivals, but they could get along fine for short bits of time. Except when they were dealing with Ivan. He brought out the worst in all of them. No matter what, he always started some kind of fight or argument.

“Yeah,” Avery said, “After we’re done, I’ll go pay him a visit.”

And after they worked out a little longer, then listened to Alan’s tips on disabling human beings, which turned out more chilling than she expected, Avery changed her shirt then went down toward Ivan’s apartment.

She was running through possible conversations in her head. There were too many possibilities, and all of them put a lump in her chest. Ivan liked her, and during brief moments she had to admit she liked him as well. They had fun. Still, he created a harsh environment, made it hard for her to navigate her daily life.

As she came down to the right floor, she made her way down the hall a few steps before realizing there was a man in the hall wearing a huge coat too hot for the season. It was Ivan!

She stopped, a brief panic going through her body, then put a hand up, “Hey, Ivan. Wait up.”

Ivan stopped for a second, then without looking back he started into a jog down the hall.

It was confusing. He definitely heard her, and it wasn’t like him to miss a chance to harass her in the halls.

“Wait!” Avery said, “We need to talk!”

He made it to his door well ahead of her, unlocked it, and then slipped inside. The door shut behind him, clicking loud enough for her to hear many steps before she ever got there.

Avery knocked hard, “Ivan, come out of there. This is me speaking as your landlord, come to the door this instant!”

She realized she was breathing hard out of frustration, so she paced back and forth there for a second while she waited for him to come to the door. Minutes passed, and nothing happened. Was he really going to just ignore her?

“Ivan,” She said with another knock, “Look, I’m sorry if I seemed mad just now. I really just want to talk with you.”

Another bit of waiting, more nothing.

She grumbled to herself. Her face felt hot, and her arms were flexing and relaxing. This was exactly why she needed to have a talk with him!

Avery reached into her back pocket, and pulled out a small set of keys.

“Ivan,” She said, “As your landlord, I’m entering the apartment.”

It felt bad. Really, she should only ever do that in an emergency, or if she gave prior notice. Though a conversation about possible eviction could probably count if Ivan took her to court.

The door opened, and she was happy he didn’t put the chain lock on. His apartment was dark, as if he wasn’t home. She flicked on the lights, closed the door and locked it behind her, and then walked inside.

“I know you’re here Ivan,” She said, “Come on out.”

His apartment was strange. It wasn’t odd like Alan or Derrick, it just felt too typical. It was like someone listed off Ivan’s personality traits, but stopped at the first three, and used that to decorate the whole space.

There was a pin-up calendar in the hallway, and two large posters of scantily clad women in the livingroom. He had a coffee table, but the only things on it were his TV remote, a heavily used ruled notebook, and a half empty box of tissues next to a container of lotion.

On the far wall was a big corkboard, with multi-colored thumbtacks collected in the corner and string hanging from a few of them. She could imagine it being set up like one of those conspiracy tracking boards, when the time called for it.

There were energy drinks and beer cans collected on the kitchen counter. Not like random trash, but stacked like cheap art to make little pyramids and towers.

A bookshelf in the corner was filled with a lot of crime novels, and the occasional popular fiction.

There weren’t any pictures of people in the room. She expected no pictures of Ivan, but there weren’t any pictures of friends either. A few frames had locations photographed, like the grand canyon. Avery walked in, and looked both ways. No sign of Ivan, no floating articles of clothing.

“Ivan,” She repeated.

It was quiet. The only sound her footsteps, and the hum of a fan on a small table next to the couch.

She went to the bathroom, opened the door with a dramatic push. He wasn’t in there. She stretched her arms out, and walked around the small space, swinging wildly in hopes of hitting him.

The bathroom could use a little cleaning. Main oddity that struck her was that the mirror was completely removed. She walked back to the living room, arms still out, tracing the edges of the room with wild waving arms.

There weren’t any mirrors.

She kept focused. Thinking where Ivan would hide. His apartment only had two windows out, and both opened to sheer drops too high to manage. She checked the tub.

Avery peeked into his bedroom. A large king bed in a dark room. There she found his discarded coat and pants, sitting right in the entryway. She looked around the room, and noticed a light. It was in the closet, flashing red every second. She prepared herself for a confrontation with a man that now had open hid from her.

She yanked the closet open, and shouted, “Ah ha!” Her arms reached out and ran through the hanging shirts and coats. Nothing. She kneeled down and tried again at leg level, still nothing.

“Damnit Ivan!” Avery said.

When she went to investigate the flashing light, it was a camera on a tripod. It looked like it was there to record through the slit, focused right on his bed.

“Really Ivan? How often are you bringing ladies back for the night. Pervert.”

She shook her head, then looked up. The closet had a high shelf, and one of the books there looked like an old photo album. It had her name written into the side with fading marker. She reached up and pulled it down, nearly knocking a few boxes over in the process.

It definitely was old. Looking at the front, it looked like grandpa’s handwriting on the cover. Just their name, and a range of years.

“Ivan,” She said to the probably empty room, “why do you have this?”

She turned on the light, then went over to the bed and sat down on the edge. When she opened the cover, there was a large picture there of her, as a little girl, with a pink birthday hat and balloon. Her cake was smudged across her face.

Avery’s eyes narrowed, and she turned the page. It started with more of her at the birthday party. Some shots had her with her mom and dad, playing out in the little grass lot behind the apartment. Then there were a few of her playing alone.

She turned the page, and there was a blurry shot of grandpa Avery in a mirror. Then she joined the shots. Some of them were more candid than she would expect of old photos. Her with way too many crayons out, a collection of pictures in front of her. Her making a face of disgust, as if she just tasted peas for the first time.

More of her running in the field, close ups of her laughing, tea parties by herself, curled up sleeping on the edge of the couch.

She wanted to smile, remembering the fun times with her grandpa. All she could think of though was that this was hidden in Ivan’s bedroom. What did he need with pictures of her as a child? The idea scared her.

Avery shook her head. Ivan was a dick, a bit of a pervert, but he wasn’t a bad man. At least, she hoped he wasn’t. He was just a troublemaker. She needed to talk to him.

“Ivan, please come out,” She pleaded while looking around the room, “We need to talk about this, please. I know I said we should only talk business, but this sort of is my business.”

Still nothing. She let out a sigh. If he didn’t respond to that, an earnest call for help, what could she even do?

She squeezed her eyes shut, she knew the answer to that.

Avery put the book aside, and stood up from the bed. She pulled her shirt up, revealing her bra to the room.

“Will you come out if you get to touch these?” She said, her eyebrow raised, “One squeeze, one talk.”

Silence.

She grumbled, and pulled up her sports bra, letting her breasts fall free. The room at least felt a little cooler without them cooped up. Though it wasn’t going to do any wonders for her nipples.

“How about now?” She said, “If you’re here Ivan, that’s two handfuls, if you come out and talk. Consider this a verbal contract. Going once…”

There wasn’t even a sound. She let her shirt rest up, nipples still peeking beneath the loose material. It seemed he wasn’t in the apartment after all. The question was how he got around her.

Then her eyes widened with a thought. She snapped her fingers, and turned toward the bed. She put her thumbs in the waistband of her shorts, and fought to tug the tight fitting exercise shorts down. Her thong came down with them, her bottom sliding into view inch by inch.

“Well how about this,” Avery said with a saleswoman’s tone, “A hard squeeze here, we can time it to, say, two minutes. You can even give it a kiss if that’s what gets you off. Hell, we can even discuss that bj, just please come and talk-”

Avery let out a shriek as she felt a sharp pinch on her exposed butt.

“Why do you have my photo album,” Ivan said behind her.

Avery fell back to a seated position on the bed, and tried to pull her shorts up. It was too hard to even get them back up right, so she gave up on it, and instead put her arms around her partially exposed chest.

“Ivan! What took you so long?” She snapped.

He chuckled, though she noticed it wasn’t as boisterous as usual, “You were giving me a strip show. What reason did I have to come out?”

“But,” She said with a little curiosity, “you did.”

Ivan was quiet for a moment, “That butt of yours is hard to resist, baby. I mean, madame landlord.”

She frowned, and pulled down her shirt, “Don’t be an ass. Are you here to explain why you have grandpa’s photo album?”

The book floated up, and Avery could feel the bed depress where he sat down next to her.

“He gave it to me,” Ivan said, “I own it. You know, like all the other stuff you were rifling through.”

“He gave you that?” Avery said, “Also, I barely touched anything. You could have just come outside.”

“Yes he did,” Ivan replied with a snippy tone, “and I’m pretty sure you aren’t the police, and can’t force me out without legal notice. You enjoy the tour?”

Her chest was fluttering. This was getting off on the wrong foot, just like she feared. So far, she was definitely the bad guy.

“No mirrors?” She asked.

“Useless. They just get dirty. Thought about having one on the ceiling in here, you know, for guests.”

She rolled her eyes. “Also, if you want me to believe you bring back guests, maybe don’t leave out your spank supplies.”

“I wasn’t expecting a fucking home invasion today, I apologize madame landlord.”

“Stop calling me that!” Avery shouted, “and grandpa didn’t give you an album full of pictures of me. So why do you have that?”

In the silence that followed, she could hear Ivan’s hands grip down hard on the book. He opened it a few pages in. There she was sitting at a tea party, dressed in a wide brimmed hat, serving invisible tea for an empty table.

“Do you even remember back then?” Ivan asked.

Avery shrugged, “Sort of. I mean, I was a little girl. I would come over to grandpa’s all the time then, before me moved out of state.”

She would have tea parties all the time. Grandpa always kept the table and tea kit around, in case she wanted to set up. She would serve the whole party, have little conversations with herself.

“I still hate tea,” Ivan said, “I couldn’t understand why we couldn’t just fill the cups with something real.”

Avery’s heart skipped.

“What?” She whispered.

He turned the page to her running in a field, “You came over all the time, and we would play. It was really the only time I was allowed to talk to someone from outside the apartment. Old Avery was always serious about that.”

“No,” Avery said with a shake of her head, “I mean, I would remember that.”

She remembered that weird memory of her mom talking about her imaginary friend. She had shrugged it off before as a bad memory, one in many possible names, her mind plugging in what she wanted to hear at the time.

He scoffed, “You were little. I figure you just moved on. Plus you called me a lot of stuff, and I sort of went along with it. It was exciting to be talked to at all.”

“You’ve been here that long?” Avery said, looking up to about where she thought his face would be.

He turned back to the picture in the mirror, “Yea, something like that. Look there, like right there.”

He grabbed her hand and pulled her finger to the picture. She leaned in and squinted. She could just barely make something out, like an outline of discoloration.

“Is that you?” Avery said with a soft laugh, “Grandpa was taking a picture of you.”

“Tried to at least.”

“That’s why you hate mirrors,” She said, “they can see you a little. Like a reverse vampire.”

Ivan turned the page, “Oh god that’s the lamest thing you’ve ever said. Don’t say some shit like that again.”

She started to laugh, but then her eyes started to burn, and tears started to well up.

“Whoa whoa,” Ivan said, “What’s wrong?”

She blinked them back, “You’ve been here this whole time, and I kept threatening to kick you out. Wow, I really am a bitch.”

He leaned away from her, and came back with a packet of tissues whose use she didn’t want to think about. He took one out, and dabbed at her eyes.

“Just a little bit of a bitch,” he said, “I mean, I don’t blame you with the people you deal with here.”

She took a deep breath, squeezed her hands together.

“Ivan,” She said, “you really stress me out, okay?”

He gasped, “Me? There’s two aliens constantly trying to bang you, and I stress you out?”

She waved his words away with her hand, “Alan is a teddy bear, and Derrick is a spider that couldn’t hurt a fly. You on the other hand, you are fun to be around, and you make me laugh, and I like playing with you, but…”

“Oh hell no,” Ivan said, the book falling as he stood up from the bed, “last time you started a speech like that, I didn’t see you for a decade and a half. Look, lil Avery, I know I’m a jerkwad to a cunt depending on the time of day, but please don’t make me go.”

“Make you go?” She echoed back. The words were almost childish, like a little kid afraid of being abandoned. It made her whole body feel light, like her head wasn’t attached to her neck. She couldn’t think straight.

“No,” Avery said, “Ivan, I won’t. You can stay, grandpa wouldn’t have it any other way.”

There was a pause, “Oh.”

He sat back down, “I mean, I had a lot more begging in me. Just sayin’.”

She shoved him in the arm.

“Look,” She said, “you can’t be mean to the other tenants. When I went to help Derrick, it might have been some crazy spider-chick that tried to kill him, but you pushed him to hide in his room.”

“You mean I can’t argue with your boyfriend,” Ivan said with a click of his tongue.

“They aren’t my boyfriends!” She shouted in reply.

“So you just give blow jobs to anyone then?” Ivan said.

She furrowed her brow, “At that point you’d be my boyfriend too!”

As soon as the words left her mouth she slapped her hand over it and turned deep crimson.

“Forget I said that,” She said.

Ivan didn’t reply.

“Ivan.”

“Okay,” He said, “Forgotten. Erased from the memory banks.”

“Do you get my point though?” She asked, with her hands out, “I want you here. I’m realizing now, I sort of need your help. You’ve helped me every chance you can.”

“Oh you noticed that huh?” He said with a bit of venom.

“You just go ahead and create another problem while you help solve the first one, and don’t reply to that because it is true. I know you’re just looking out for me, but you have to let me choose when I come for your help, okay? Don’t try to mess with my social life.”

Avery had the dreaded realization that her social life was arguments between a giant spider, some sort of alien, and an invisible naked man.

Ivan stood up with the book in hand, walked over, and put it in the closet.

“Okay,” He said, “on one condition.”

“Name it,” She said with a smile of relief.

“You said we would discuss the blow job.”

“It isn’t happening,” She said, “that’s the end of the discussion.”

He grunted until it turned into low laughter, “Oh you crafty little… okay. What about this. I want a date.”

“A date?” She said, her back straightening at the suggestion, “What kind of date?”

He fixed the coats in the closet, “the kind that has a chance to end in a blowjob. What do you mean what kind? We go somewhere, have a good time, you hopefully laugh at my bad jokes and it doesn’t end with you yelling at me for saving you from spiders.”

She wasn’t against it. Actually, despite the conclusion, the time she joined him on one of his investigations was one of the highlights of the summer.

“Deal,” She said, “if you can keep a lid on your behavior for say, two weeks, while still being social, you get a date.”

“Can I get a date for every two weeks?”

“Start slow,” she said with a straight face.

“Okay, okay. Though, know in future investigations I do have leverage.”

She rolled her eyes, “What, you were the only one who heard that little slip.”

He reached into the closet, and pulled the camera off the top of its tripod.

“Wait,” She said, her eyes going wide, “Wait!”

He brought it over, and she could see the screen as he rewound it. First he went back far enough for her to see her little strip show, “Oh that’s going in the bank.”

“Ivan,” She said, “delete all that!”

Then he stopped at a later part, “You’d be my boyfriend too!”

“Oh wow,” Ivan said, “I mean you come on a little strong. At least get me dinner first madame.”

She tried to reach out for the camera, but Ivan pulled away, and then put the camera up in the closet as well.

“Okay, whatever, I know you’re too smart to do anything but use that for your pathetic jerk off sessions,” She said, “I’m out of here.”

“One second,” He said, “I remember there was something about two minutes of booty grabbing, and a kiss.”

Avery opened her mouth to argue, and then felt her face flush again. She did promise, and it did finally make him come out and agree to be better. Hopefully he would hold to it.

Her shorts were still a little jumbled on her waist, so she stood and made a coy turn until her rear was pointing toward him.

“Am I going to have to count this off, or will you be quick?”

She felt a shove into her back, and she fell face first onto the soft mattress. Ivan pinned her legs dowd with his weight around her knees, and then took two large handfuls of her rear, kneading her cheeks like dough.

“Are you kidding? I’m going to enjoy every second, you better get a stop watch.”

“Damnit Ivan!” She shouted, though she found herself giggling.

She felt teeth bite into her butt, and cried out, “Ah, what is that?”

“That count as a kiss?” He said, “or do I just get to use my lips.”

She buried her head in her hands. Her face was so hot she could barely think, and her face was red all over.

“You’re wasting seconds,” She said, “Don’t think I’m not counting.”

He ran his hands over her skin like she was a magic ball he was trying to divine knowledge from, then he buried his face into her cheeks, “Yeah right, don’t worry, I bet you’ve already started over a few times.”

Actually, she had.

At least her back didn’t seem to hurt anymore.